Thoughts For The Week:

May 8th

I have been thinking about my Transition lately, from where I was to where I am now. In the beginning, I was sure I was a woman. However, I was not very sure how my transition was going to go. I can now say yes, I was kind of selfish then. I was only thinking about my happiness. I really didn't know how this would affect the people in my family or my friends. I did learn very quickly who was and was not a true friend. I lost someone whom I thought of more as a brother than a friend; that is how close I thought we were. We had some deep conversations about what was going on in our lives. I never told my friend that I was transgender. That was one thing I never could come out and tell them. With how close I thought we were, I thought they would ask me about what was going on; they just cut me out of their life.

As I continued down my transition path, I had to keep coming out to the rest of my friends and family. My children accepted my decision to transition; they just wanted to see me happy. My parents were mixed, my mom was accepting at first, and my dad accepted my decision. I will discuss that in a later discussion. The rest of my friends were curious but were accepting and sometimes accommodating. One of my girl-friends even gave me some of her dresses that she no longer wore and didn't fit anymore.

As time went on, I continued to become more comfortable in my body. I was seeing changes really quickly. I do have to admit that the second "puberty" that Transgender women go through is not any fun. The hot flashes alone are enough grief to go through, but then there is the itchiness of the upper chest as that part started to grow. This is what I went through in the beginning. I know everyone has different experiences that they go through in their transition. I do have a couple of trans sisters who started after I had, and they are experiencing some of the same symptoms I had in the beginning.

As I write this blog, I can say that transitioning is not an easy path to take. I had times when I doubted my decision to transition. I never had thoughts of detransitioning. I do know I was not happy pretending to be male. I still have all the same hobbies and interests I had previously; I am just in a body shape that better fits my inner self. I am taking this journey one day at a time.